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Equality V.S Power & Control

Updated: Jul 10


Equality V.S Power & Control


What is power and control in relationships?


Unhealthy relationships are characterized by power and control. One half of the relationship is taking the power away from the other half and has control over that person and the relationship. This is when you begin to see unhealthy and abusive tendencies arise.


What are power and control issues?


Control issues is a general term for when people seem overly focused on controlling situations around them. Control issues could stem from high anxiety, obsessive-compulsive symptoms, or other mental health conditions. Some people with control issues will attempt to micromanage every aspect of a situation.




What are the 4 cycles of emotional abuse?


stage 1: tension building. stage 2: incident of violence. stage 3: reconciliation. stage 4: calm.


Stages of grooming often look like:

  • Step 1: Victim selection. ...

  • Step 2: Gain access to the victim and build trust. ...

  • Step 3: Build trust. ...

  • Step 4: Isolate. ...

  • Step 5: Normalize abusive behavior and desensitize sexual touch. ...

  • Step 6: Maintain control and power.



But, what does it mean to have an equal relationship?


Equality in a relationship means that each person's interests and desires are respected and met to a reasonable degree as opposed to just one partner's needs dominating the relationship. Inequality in a relationship refers to an imbalance of power between partners.



The Impact of Grooming in Adult Relationships


Grooming is a term that is often used to describe the process of building trust and manipulating before they are abused. But grooming can also happen to adults in relationships. Understanding what grooming looks like is essential, so you can recognize it if it happens to you or someone you know.



In summary, equity theory suggests that people are more satisfied with a relationship in which there is equal give and take by both parties. This theory proposes that a person's motivation to stay in any relationship is based on the equality (or inequality) of the contributions made to the relationship by each person.




What is Grooming?


Grooming refers to a pattern of behaviors that predators use to gain access to people who are vulnerable, build trust, and ultimately gain control over them for exploitation. This can include physical, sexual and verbal abuse as well as emotional manipulation.



Predators may use manipulation tactics such as flattery, compliments, gifts, lies, threats, or coercion to create an environment where victims feel trapped and unable to leave the situation despite feeling uncomfortable or unsafe. In adult relationships, grooming behavior could be anything from excessive compliments and gifts to inappropriate touching or pressuring someone into something they don’t want to do.



How is Grooming Different in Adult Relationships?



In adult relationships, grooming may not always be immediately noticeable since it often starts with subtle signs that escalate over time. Furthermore, adults may be more likely than children to feel embarrassed or ashamed if they realize they are being groomed in a relationship because they think they should have recognized the signs sooner. Additionally, adults may be less likely than children to tell someone about their experiences due to feelings of guilt or fear of not being believed. It is crucial for survivors of grooming and other forms of abuse in adult relationships to remember that no one deserves this kind of treatment. It is never your fault if someone else manipulates or harms you.




Understanding the concept of grooming in adult relationships is crucial so we can recognize potential warning signs early on and protect ourselves from experiencing any form of abuse. If you have experienced any form of abuse at the hands of another person—whether physical, sexual, verbal, or financial—it’s ok to take time for yourself and seek help without feeling guilty or ashamed about what has happened. There are many resources available online and hotlines staffed by trained counselors who can provide support and guidance on how best to cope with these difficult experiences. You do not have to go through this alone!



When You Need Help After Sexual Assault

In the aftermath of a sexual assault, physical, verbal or financial violence it is important for those affected to know that they are not alone. At We Fit Health & Wellness/Pathway To Peace, we are committed to providing supportive and compassionate counsel while fighting hard for your rightful compensation and holding your perpetrator accountable for their actions.




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